On Love and Intimacy

“It’s just sex, right?” This is a common notion for a lot of people nowadays, especially the single youth. That is why this generation does one-night stands, have “friends with benefits”, and other catchy terms for casual sex. Well, there’s nothing wrong with it. After all, it’s just sex, a part of our human nature. It’s just sex, a purely physical thing wherein we use our bodies to make us feel good, right? Unfortunately, that is not the case.

The Christian church in Dubai, America, and many other organizations have been trying to confront this reality: sex isn’t just a physical activity, and that you can get hurt if you treat it as such.

Scars from the Past

Think about it; if sex really is as purely physical as a lot of people say it is, then why is it that a lot of people get hang-ups as well as emotional damage from it?

There are cases where it is clearly evident that it isn’t just a physical activity but has emotional and psychological underpinnings. Cases of sexual abuse are sensitive and serious examples of this. It takes years for victims to recover from it, sometimes even almost their entire lives.  The most heartbreaking part is that it happens to women, men, and children; and not a lot of people are discussing the dangers of it. In fact frustratingly, it is the victims that are being shamed for this and it is a topic that is being shunned and shelved because of its very sensitivity.

Clearly, sex needs to be taken seriously because it can have an even deeper effect on people.

Something Deep to Something Physical

Well, if that’s not the case, then why is it that a lot of people – probably including you – think that it’s just an act where you use your body to feel good with somebody, nothing more and nothing less? That’s because we live in a culture that claims that sex is just a simple, superficial, and physical activity. And for a lot of people, that’s a very convenient mindset, as it would allow them to think that they can have sex recreationally. But at one point or another, the reality that sex goes beyond physical comes crashing on them.

Going Beyond Feeling Good

Of course, sex is something that should be enjoyed, but its purpose for human beings – God’s most precious creation – is a lot deeper, a lot more special. It’s for a word that we don’t usually hear anymore: intimacy.

The main purpose of sex is for us to be able to express our intimacy with someone in a physical manner. In fact, if you take into consideration the Creation Story, it was first the animals that had sex. But when the gift was given to Adam and Eve, and ultimately to us, it was on an entirely different level. It’s not just about procreation, but about an expression of intimacy that is passionate, fearless, and incomparable. That is why sex, a wonderful thing, can be so damaging when misused, and so beautiful when it’s done in the context of true intimacy – between two people who truly love each other.

Sex is supposed to feel good. However, it’s not supposed to feel that way just because the body says it does, but because it is the greatest physical expression of intimacy. Love and intimacy is always  good, and that is why it must be treasured and cherished and not be treated as a sport.

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